29 February 2008

Ketchup Packet Says "Cool It"

The years post Seinfeld’s salsa/seltzer episode were questionable for America’s table condiments. The inflammatory comment from George, “Salsa is now the number one condiment in America”, resonated in the minds of billions and was the stab in the back that its 3rd cousin (related through tomato) Ketchup (also catsup) didn’t deserve. In the 15 years of squirming in pain, the only retaliatory move has been to turn ketchup green.

From now on when asked, “Don’t you know the difference between seltzer and salsa?” You can look to the single serving package for Heinz’s reply, it is beautifully illustrated in the form of The-Fonz-packet as thou saying, “Hey…Cool it.”

This is a great example of why the print industry still exists. Let's face facts--it's concrete. There it is real as ever in my hand, it's tear squeezes out lustrous ketchup on top a fry, it's all happening to me. I'm not watching it on T.V. or via the Internet; this moment is as solid as the rock used by ketchup to cave in the skull of salsa.

These are happy days.

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